Wednesday, December 7, 2011

My Absence


I'm having a blogging identity crisis.

I started out on a high note. I felt good about myself. I was writing! It didn't really matter what I was saying. The point was that I was saying something.

That initial joy quickly faded. What was I saying and who was I saying it to? I was saying nothing to nobody.** My biggest fear of the blogging world became truth. I was just another faceless keyboard linking you to my favorite products on Etsy and vaguely asking how your Tuesdays went. What a waste of my time. What a waste of your time!

I never wanted Waking on the Wing to become my personal venting journal where I dish about all my friends and how I'm mad that they didn't make me personalized birthday cards with my favorite nicknames in glittered letters (insert pouty face); however, the last thing I wanted it to become was a reproduction of the zillions of things already on the world wide web.

So, where is that fine line between airing dirty laundry and a link list? I don't know. I want to figure it out, though.

This past month I've contemplated canning Waking on the Wing. I didn't really know what purpose I wanted it to serve, and, rather embarrass myself anymore, I wanted to remove it from public eyes. Did I really talk about the "nautical look"?

However, I love writing. I love it! I received a BA in English and I want to use it, dang it! Currently this blog is my only outlet to do so and I want to honor that. I want to continue to practice my craft and I want to do it well.

What is writing if it's not honest? What is writing if it doesn't magnify a part of our seemingly normal lives so we can sit back and say, "That is a beautiful rose petal." We need writing to slow ourselves down, to remember we have emotions, and to remember we live in a community of people that also cry at the end of The Graduate.

I'll try to do that from now on. I'll mess up every once in a while, mind you. I know one day I'll be tempted to post about an Anthropologie dress I must have. But hey, I'm human! Besides, not every conversation can revolve around Niche's "super man" or Virginia Woolf's use of color in her novels and its reflection on femininity. I'd go crazy.

So, here it is. Waking on the Wing, Round 2. I hope you enjoy.

Love, Alli

**Note: If you're reading this, you're not a nobody. In fact, I greatly appreciate you! You're one of the fine few who I value as my readership. Basically, you're the bomb and I write for you. So, thank you.


  1. I've definitely walked through this a lot, too!

    It's tough to find that balance where you're writing something YOU enjoy...but also something that you feel others will stop to enjoy and appreciate. Something that's light and easy...but also has the ability to be deep and expressive.

    In a world of blogs that share the latest thing to buy, or post pinterest finds or whatever, it can be SO so easy to start slipping into that! (Not that I mind that type of blogging! Or that I look down on that style...but I do think it's less challenging. Always regurgitating pretty things that someone else made/wrote just IS easier! And like you--it's just not what I set out to do!)

    Anyway, all this to say...I've been there! I've had moments where I thought of just scrapping my blog altogether. But, don't. It's so worth it. I'm no expert...I'm just a little blogger. But after three years, it's so fun for me to look back at what I've shared and the friendships I've made because of blogging.

    Stay true to whoever "you" are every day. Even if that means just posting a pretty Anthropologie dress from time to time. :)

  2. This is why you're my bff :) Allison, you know I've felt the same way. It's easy to have writers block when you're not sure who you're writing to or what you want to say. I know I've failed a lot as a co-blogger here (blah) but I don't think we should quit. I love that there is a waking on the wing part II. Because life changes, our perspectives change... We thought this blog was going to be reflections of our super successful freelancer lives, and things have changed a lot! But one thing hasn't. I still want to live life with you and celebrate the triumphs and challenges along the way :) Whether that means through this blog or not (but I'm thinking we both need this) in Raleigh or in Houston.

    I love you and your writing. Don't you ever dare give up on it. Or I'm forced to punch you. (with love)